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the ire of d'oh …
12/29/16 16:43"sir … your umbrella is dripping onto my freshly waxed floor."
"d'oh" i thought to myself. eyeing the woman behind the desk, i cleared my throat. "i came to hand-deliver my application, ma'am." handing the document to her … couldn't help but notice one of her earrings missing. "i am a silly one, indeed," i thought quietly.
"ma'am," i said in a whisper, "ma'am … one of your earrings is missing." wasn't certain she heard me or not.
then she sighed hoarsely and declared "but, sir … your application is only half-filled out." continuing, she pointed out, "you are missing current residence and current marital status … oh, and the application is filled out in pencil … this needs to be totally redone, sir!" with an exasperated snort … she flung the paper in front of me.
"d'oh!" i exclaimed under my breath. "ma'am … may i please have a new application?" finding a seat close to the woman's desk … i sat down to fill out the blank application. "d'oh" suddenly realizing i had no pen … i hastened back up to where the woman was sitting. "pls, ma'am … do you have a pen i may borrow?"
her eyes bore into me … as though a spike was being chiseled through palm of my right hand. nervously i cleared my parched throat.
within ten minutes, i finished the application … delivering it to the front of her desk. remembering i had left the pen back at my chair, hurriedly fetched the instrument. "i am such a half-wit," exasperatedly, i sighed.
by the time i had returned to the woman's desk … she had just gotten off the phone … and commenced to previewing my application. the earring was still missing … but, this time, thought to keep my mouth shut.
"ma'am, if you please … i'd like to have council with the person in charge of interviews."
"am sure you would, sir … quite honestly, he's out of town today … won't be expecting him until thursday morning."
trying to remember which day was today … i suddenly realized my watch was at home. "d'oh" i said aloud.
"i beg your pardon, sir?"
"oh, it's nothing ma'am … just left my watch at home."
"sir … your application states your gender is male … if you don't mind me asking, why are you wearing lipstick, high-heels and a dress?"
"d'oh!" i nervously exclaimed in an undertone. "thought this was membership to a transgender club?"
i heard giggling behind her desk. "not to worry, sir … i mean "ma'am". remember how you told me earlier i was missing earring? well … i am not a "she" either".
d'oh!
"d'oh" i thought to myself. eyeing the woman behind the desk, i cleared my throat. "i came to hand-deliver my application, ma'am." handing the document to her … couldn't help but notice one of her earrings missing. "i am a silly one, indeed," i thought quietly.
"ma'am," i said in a whisper, "ma'am … one of your earrings is missing." wasn't certain she heard me or not.
then she sighed hoarsely and declared "but, sir … your application is only half-filled out." continuing, she pointed out, "you are missing current residence and current marital status … oh, and the application is filled out in pencil … this needs to be totally redone, sir!" with an exasperated snort … she flung the paper in front of me.
"d'oh!" i exclaimed under my breath. "ma'am … may i please have a new application?" finding a seat close to the woman's desk … i sat down to fill out the blank application. "d'oh" suddenly realizing i had no pen … i hastened back up to where the woman was sitting. "pls, ma'am … do you have a pen i may borrow?"
her eyes bore into me … as though a spike was being chiseled through palm of my right hand. nervously i cleared my parched throat.
within ten minutes, i finished the application … delivering it to the front of her desk. remembering i had left the pen back at my chair, hurriedly fetched the instrument. "i am such a half-wit," exasperatedly, i sighed.
by the time i had returned to the woman's desk … she had just gotten off the phone … and commenced to previewing my application. the earring was still missing … but, this time, thought to keep my mouth shut.
"ma'am, if you please … i'd like to have council with the person in charge of interviews."
"am sure you would, sir … quite honestly, he's out of town today … won't be expecting him until thursday morning."
trying to remember which day was today … i suddenly realized my watch was at home. "d'oh" i said aloud.
"i beg your pardon, sir?"
"oh, it's nothing ma'am … just left my watch at home."
"sir … your application states your gender is male … if you don't mind me asking, why are you wearing lipstick, high-heels and a dress?"
"d'oh!" i nervously exclaimed in an undertone. "thought this was membership to a transgender club?"
i heard giggling behind her desk. "not to worry, sir … i mean "ma'am". remember how you told me earlier i was missing earring? well … i am not a "she" either".
d'oh!
